Trust

Faithfulness to your spouse:

One of the most important aspects of a relationship is trust. When there is trust in a relationship, everything else can be worked through. My parents used to tell me as a kid, “Connor, we want you to always remember that it is more important to be trusted than to be loved.” They explained, “you could do anything and we would still love you. Trust, however, is something that is so hard to build and so easily broken.” I have always remembered this important lesson and strived to live my life in a way that allowed others to have trust in me. This has led me to be more obedient, honest, and open with those I care about because I have never wanted to betray their trust. This is so important with families. We must be trustworthy enough that our spouses can tell us their problems and our kids feel like they can talk to us. Trust allows peace in the home and eliminates worry. Trust is something to be earned. It is done through high moral values and by setting boundaries that you will not cross.

My dad was a great example of this. When we were kids, every time a semi-scandelous scene would come on the tv, my dad would grab the blanket and pull it in front of our two faces. This showed me the man that I wanted to be. I wanted to be the man who respects women so much that he refuses to degrade them by looking. Even now, because of him, I look away whenever bad scenes come on the Tv. Another thing he taught me is to avoid the appearance of evil. He never meets with his female receptionist for lunch or does anything with the opposite sex without my mom. In my home, how can you question the intents of a man like that when he makes such careful steps in preventing mistakes? I absolutely love my dad and am so grateful that he taught me to honor the women in my life, not only by the things I do for them, but the things I choose not to do for them.

So how do you accomplish this unity and trust in a relationship? The first is communication. Being open with your partner about things that bother each other in positive and loving ways is the best way to establish a communicative relationship. Being openly appreciative and loving of your spouse will enable criticism like this to be accepted in a gracious way instead of feeling picky and mean. Be open about what you are doing and who you are going with. The second step is embracing your religion with your family. Family prayer and scripture study builds family unity and allows your children to understand the importance of the spirit in the home and how much their parents care about them and want them to grow up with a solid gospel foundation. Doing service for each other and with each other allows the family to bond closer and builds trust.

If you have messed up or don’t have the relationships you want, there is always hope. Relationships are not healed lightly, but because of the atonement of christ, there is no wound too deep to be healed by him. Some will take lifetimes, but through repentance and an increase of love towards your family, there is always hope. I have known people who have made these heartbreaking mistakes and feel hopeless. There is always hope. Jesus Christ suffered and died that no one could sink below his outretched arms.